आर्ज़ू न बन...

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आंसू बन, कभी तो छलक पड़ेगा
आर्ज़ू न बन,
शय में सिर्फ इंतज़ार रहेगा ..

रात बन, कुछ पहरों का हिसाब पड़ेगा
याद न बन,
उम्र भर का तू मेहमान बनेगा ..

बेवफा बन, वफ़ा का भ्रम तो टूटेगा
वादा न बन,
निभाने का तुझपे क़र्ज़ रहेगा ..

ज़िन्दगी में शामिल हैं तो , बंदगी बन
अफसाना न बन,
फिर प्यार का ज़माना नहीं रहेगा

Comments

Cheeku said…
Be a tear, that ll at least drop down sometime,
Be not hope, which will keep you waiting forever.

Be the night, that lasts for some hours,
Be not the memory, which will haunt you forever.

Be unfaithful, at least the mirage of faith wont last,
Be not the promise, which will keep you indebted forever.

Involved in this life, be a partner,
not the obsessed, for, the world of Love will be lost forever.

In short- fandu poem :P Such deep meaning da :) Great work.. I shall use this idea to write a poem in English. Pls dont file for rights violation :P
April 4, 2009 at 7:11 AM
aastha-inks said…
Thanks for that wonderful translation cheeku..:) for u, i won't file for rights violation da..:)
April 4, 2009 at 8:48 PM
aastha-inks said…
@cheeku: as an after thought, i think your english version sounds really good, mayb better than the original. jus one ammendment you wld have to incorporate.. in the last line, afsana means "affair".. so it would mean- .. be there forever; not a fleeting affair, coz mayb hereon the time for love would pass..
April 5, 2009 at 2:33 AM
Cheeku said…
It was a rough translation.. Besides.. Original is always insuperable. Lets just say i added my own flavor with that line :)

English version might be ok, but I am not half as creative as yourself. It was so brilliantly thought out.. U deserve complete credit!
April 5, 2009 at 2:41 AM
Anonymous said…
from this i have written somethin

Dont be a tear that comes everyday,
Be a smile that makes u laugh a one day!!and the rest coming days!!

Dont be the night, that has endless counting of sleepless hours!!
Be a stumble memory that can rejuvenate

Be the faith,which revoke miseries from self
Be the promise that is unbroken in itself

Be involved in life,pray to almighty that with ur love no heart ll be broken!!!
April 5, 2009 at 12:27 PM
aastha-inks said…
y is everyone changing my version ?! :P my work is quite inspiring huh...:) haffon..
April 5, 2009 at 11:16 PM
Rag said…
ur hindi version is better aastha!!! though cheeku's translation is good too!!
but beautifully written..!!
awesome!!!
April 6, 2009 at 12:39 AM
Anusha Bharadwaj said…
Its an amazing piece of work da..very creative..i'm really dumbfounded by how beautifully you have portrayed such deep thoughts with simple words.The poem has a tranquil feel to it,which is ironic because the overall effect of the poem borders on the lines of melancholy.
April 6, 2009 at 2:38 AM
aastha-inks said…
rags and anu..thanks :)
April 6, 2009 at 2:51 AM
Anonymous said…
actually:):):)!!!
April 6, 2009 at 9:25 PM
aastha-inks said…
@anon.. thats good to knw. no doubt, I like the positivity in ur version. I would have liked it better, if you gave urself a name.. :)
April 7, 2009 at 1:31 AM
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