The Wish

A day short of turning 28, Renuka’s life seemed to be a drag now. For the last three years it was a banal routine she had been following. Smiling at the reception desk of Infinity International, she thought her facial muscles had now begun to ache. Infinity was a well known restaurant in Connaught Place, often-ed by the well to do and pompous delhi-ites. Looking at them only made her sick of people who had had everything in life. Money, fame, friends.. just about everything. It made her wonder why she even had an existence such as hers.

This day, Renuka had a small change in her routine. She left work two hours early. This hadn’t happened for any reason in the past year or so. Mr. Rastogi, her supervising manager, had given her permission for the short leave today. She had to collect her reports from the diagnosis centre before it closed at 6pm. It would take her atleast an hour to reach Anandmayi Diagnostic Centre in Mehrauli.

She readied herself for the ride on her rickety Kinetic Honda which she had gotten two months back at a second hand bazaar. Her daily commute to Infinity was by bus considering she couldn’t afford the costs of petrol for a daily ride. Today was an opportunity to defy the dreaded bus and Renuka was happy about the change.

Infact a month earlier, on one such ride on her honda, she had felt a dizziness and had had to park on the sidewalk while she regained her balance. This repeated itself a couple of times when she was at work, in the bazaar and once in the kitchen. She didn’t care much but when this happened at work, Mr. Rastogi reprimanded her for the negligence. And so here she was heading to find out what the reports said.

On the roads of Delhi. Crowded. Noisy. Dusty. And the glaring sun, only worsened it. None of this seemed to affect Renuka though. She was busy making her way through the scores of buzzling buyers at Sarojini Nagar. It reminded her of the days when she and Prakash would walk hand in hand on these roads. When Prakash would want to buy something for her and she would modestly say no. He bought it anyway, she loved it anyway. She thought it was love until one day Prakash decided to consider a Dubai based job offer. There was no talk of marriage. He left as though nothing had happened. “Take care”, he had said, the last time they met. Amitabh Bachchan also wished this to all the strangers who watched him on television. Renuka couldn’t decide if she had been just that in Prakash’s life, a stranger. Had they even known each other? When did things change so much? Was there no meaning to all their months of togetherness? She had no answers to any of these. Two years after he had left, she still really wished she could know the answers.

Manasi had always warned her against an affair. She had known the world far too well. She had lived alone for over four years now. Her husband had deserted her for her colleague.
Renuka now steered her honda into the road that lead to her sister Manasi’s house in Haus Kauz. Manasi worked & stayed in that house, as a caretaker of a rich old woman. The problem was that Manasi couldn’t be away from the old lady’s house for long, without having anyone to watch over. She couldn’t have any visitors as well, considering that this wasn’t her house after all. It was nevertheless a secure arrangement for Manasi and her daughter, Maahi. On weekends, Manasi would urge Renuka to take Maahi around the city so that the little girl didn’t get too bored at home.

Renuka treasured her moments with Maahi. She admired the innocence and care freeness in her niece. Maahi’s world was her school and the activities that went on there. Renuka was unhappy that Maahi being such a bright girl should go to a public school. The school she now went to was no match for her potential. But neither of the sisters could afford a better school for Maahi. During their weekend trips, Renuka made sure Maahi got to see the better world. So far she had taken Maahi to see the Rashtrapati Bhavan and Qutb Minar. They had spent the whole day out and finally eaten at Zaika, a roadside dhaba near Renuka’s house. Then they had made an STD call to Maahi’s grandparents in Bhopal. Renuka wanted to show Maahi all the other interesting places in Delhi. She wanted Maahi to learn from travel and experience rather than thinking the school is her only source of learning. She really wished Maahi to have a better life than both the sisters had had.

The traffic signal seemed to go red and green while Renuka still found herself on the same road. There was an outburst of shloks and prayers from one end of the road. A huge procession of pandits and bhakts was passing by. They were carrying the idol of a God she could not identify. If her mom had seen this, she would have rattled out not only the name, but the many synonyms of the name that existed in hindu mythology. Her mother was fanatically pious. Her father was a retired clerk from the railways in Surat,Gujrat. In his long stint as a government servant, all that the family could manage was the house in Bhopal. This wasn’t the city they had wanted to settle in. But ended up there as a result of a mis-allocation by the government. No one had the patience to deal with changing the allocation to the city they had initially requested the house in- Surat. Her father had said, “If I had a son, he would have fought for our rights”. Renuka felt helpless when she accepted the job and left her parents for Delhi. One day she thought she will deal with those corrupt officials and get their house allocated to Surat. She really wished to see her parents in the surroundings they knew best.
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The procession gave way now. A few yards and she could see the Qutb, standing ever so tall. One look at the minar and memories came rattling down to Renuka. She had visited the Qutb more than once and was innocently in awe of the structure. It was the only historical monument she had seen in her entire life. When she had come here with Prakash, they had spent a long time lazing about in the Qutb gardens. Aimlessly they sat about, talked, gazed at the Qutb and continued to talk. But it was when she came here with Maahi that she had to deal with the iron pillar! Maahi had known about the story that went with the iron pillar: if one could completely encircle the pillar with your back straightened against it and made a wish, history claimed that your wish would come true!
“Please let us try embracing the pillar na maasi”, Maahi had pleaded.
“Come on Maahi this cannot be true! It’s just an age old myth. Don’t be stupid enough to try it! Anyway there is so much crowd that it’ll take a long time to get a chance to even get to the pillar”, Renuka had replied.
“Please Please Please Please maasi ”
To this Renuka gave in. Maahi’s hands could never meet. She was too small but was content trying. She then pushed Renuka to try. Reluctantly Renuka had put her hands around the pillar. She raised her shoulders and stretched her arms a little. To her surprise, her hands met at the back. Renuka smiled in surprise. Maahi was thrilled!
“Make a wish na maasi.. Kya chahiye aapko.. vo maang lo. Not everyone can do this maasi”
“Nothing Maahi. I don’t need anything and I don’t believe in this dear! ” and she had walked away from the pillar.

But it had been a good day, that day. The memories helped Renuka get past the traffic and onto the parking lot at the diagnostic centre. As she approached the diagnostic centre, a rush of fear swept through Renuka. She had never given her health a serious thought. What could have happened to her? What would the reports contain? If it was a major disease, how would she afford it? What about her plans to get settled? What about love, marriage and children? What about her parents and sister? Maahi?
Renuka’s mind wandered. Was death and pain lurking nearby while she had indeed been thinking of her life all along? The long life she assumed she had ahead. The past which she wanted to set right in the future. So far, it was albeit an existence but life it was and Death it wasn’t.

With suddenly heavier steps she entered the diagnosis centre. A receptionist remarked to help her. Renuka said “ Renuka Choudhary”. After a brief search the pleasant receptionist handed over a packet to her. Renuka looked at the envelope, lifted it from the table and placed it in her bag. She left the building in a daze.

Driving patiently against the peak hour traffic, she reached the Qutb;parked her kinetic and headed towards the monument. She took a deep breath as she stood facing the iron pillar, as though deciding on something. Then she embraced it, stretched the now weakened limbs with all her will. Her hands yet again reached one another , much to her relief. Renuka then closed her eyes and stood there for a whole minute, before she let go of the pillar.

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My first take on fiction/short story. I know it's rather long for a blog post !